Imishado lezivakashi: Inqubekela noma utopia

Okwamanje lolu hlobo ukuphathana kwabashadile njengesivakashi umshado akuseyona into entsha futhi engavamile. Kukholakala ukuthi lasungulwa Zaqala eminyakeni engaphezu kwengu-40 edlule futhi manje akuve kuvamile. imishado lezivakashi ithinta ubuhlobo somshado ngaphandle kokuhlala ndawonye nomunye. Abantu abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi umshado kuhilela ukungathembeki nhlangothi zombili bobabili indoda nenkosikazi. Empeleni, lo mbhangqwana enisezweni isimo isivakashi ngokuvamile ingekho ngisho lokuzama ukuvukela uMbuso, njengoba nje kuvamile namanje ethuthumela ilindele ukuhlangana nomunye.

Ngokwezazi zokuhlalisana kwabantu, kwezimbangela eziyinhloko zalolu hlobo lomshado ezingeni lelisetulu nokwaneliswa zamadoda nabesifazane. Uma ngaphambili kowesifazane ngokwezinga elikhulu sincike indoda, njengoba umyeni kusukela ezikhathini zasendulo ukhonza njengomdala umondli main kanye umsekeli, kodwa manje indima yabo akachaziwe ngokucacile. Phela, ngezinye izikhathi abesifazane uthole okuningi wobulili namandla, ngakho musa bathambekele ukwabelana impilo yakho nomunye umuntu.

Odokotela bengqondo zihlukaniswe phezu kangakanani nesihambeli somshado omuhle nomthelela ekukhuleni komphakathi. Abanye bakholelwa ukuthi umshado buqamama uphelele ngoku-lomshado esiteji ebuhlotsheni. Kodwa iningi labo abanamathela nesihambeli komshado abantu lobudala ngenhla engu-30. Ngalesi sikhathi, kokubili indoda nowesifazane ziyafezeka empilweni, futhi nezingane zibhekwa ngenxa yokuthi sesibadala, ngakho abasiboni isidingo ngizabalaza ukuze silondoloze ubuhlobo ezenza kube nzima bobabili abashadile. odokotela bengqondo abaningi bathi umshado ngaphandle kuhlalisana kuyinto enhle ifomula lothando wokuthola ukuphila, njengommemezeli kwendoda nowesifazane futhi akudingeki isikhathi esanele komunye nomunye, ngakho akukho umuzwa ukukhathala kusukela ubuhlobo.

Ikakhulu umshado lezivakashi athuthukiswe amazwe aseYurophu futhi esigodini sakithi namanje beqonda ngekugwetjwa ezithile emphakathini, ngakho ukuthuthukiswa yabo ehlile kakhulu. Izimfihlo umshado ojabulisayo kungenziwa kalula obonakaliswe kochwepheshe ngokuhlukana. Omunye okuhle eyinhloko ukuthi abendlu ngokuhlanganyela ngeke okudiliza ukuthandana. Wonke umuntu wesifazane ufuna indoda yakhe kube mnandi, ukugcina i-inkolo eyayinaso ezithile, athandeke nakakhulu. Lapho umyeni wami kuza kuphela ukuvakashela, umkami has ithuba eliyingqayizivele njalo phezu futhi mangaza yakho izithombe umlingani ezahlukene.

imishado lezivakashi ukuvumela ukugwema izingxabano eziningi recriminations, njengoba isikhala siqu ngayinye akugcini futhi Akabandlululi. Owesifazane angaya ngokuphepha ngokubukeka kwabo bese udala enduduzo akekho uzochitheka. Le ndoda kulokhu alinandaba amasokisi ehlakazekele, uma uthanda, angafeza lonke kusihlwa phambi TV, ukubukela ibhola hhayi ukwesaba lapho ethukuthela umkakhe.

Ekuqaleni, umshado at ibanga abaqhuba imishado ngamazwe. Umshado nomuntu wezizwe kusho ukuthi owesifazane kuyodingeka ukuba bathuthele kwelinye izwe lakhe, ukufunda olunye ulimi, ukuhlanganyela izinto imibhalo esikhundleni ngokugcwele. Ngokuvamile, bobabili abashadile bazimisele give up indlela yabo yokuphila, kodwa isifiso sokuba ndawonye. Bese kuba ndaba yokunquma ukuvakashela nomunye ngezikhathi ezithile Ukufika.

Kodwa kuyaqondakala ukuthi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi isiminingi kangakanani bobabili indoda nenkosikazi abazange bazame ukugcina ukuzimela futhi injabulo, injongo eyinhloko yilowo nalowo wesifazane ukunweba uhlobo. Ngakho-ke, ngemva kokuzalwa ekuphileni komntwana kushintsha kakhulu, ngoba izidingo zayo ukuthuthukiswa okudinga khona njalo bobabili abazali. Kwakuphakathi nalesi sikhathi umshado isivakashi kufanele ikhule ibe zoMdabu khona.

Ukuze isivakashi umshado wakhonza njengephayona nokulondoloza ubuhlobo romantic nothando okuphakade, kumelwe wena ufisa kokubili amadoda nabesifazane. inhloso mutual kuphela ukwakha ubudlelwano babo ngendlela ethile iyoba yinhle.