Indlela ukwesaba eyakho?

Man ekuqaleni kuka ebuntwaneni lalizungezwe ezinye abantu. Kodwa, noma kunjalo, abantu abaningi, xhumana ne emphakathini bavame ungumthombo izinkinga. Kunengqondo ukuphetha ngokuthi uma thina njalo ukuxhumana imvelo abo, akufanele lingabesabi abantu. Kodwa ngandlela-thile, ngaphambi izinkulumo zomphakathi, nesidingo emihlanganweni ebalulekile emsebenzini futhi kwezinye izimo ezicishe zifane nalezi lapho kudingeka ukuba baveze imizwa yabo, kubonakala sengathi thina azilungile. Indlela ukunqobile ukwesaba kwakho? Indlela ukuzimela?

Kwezinye izimo, ngenxa yokwesaba zingachazwa ngezinqubo ezithile izenzakalo ezibuhlungu ezithinta psyche, iba umthombo kwabokufika nomphakathi, lapho umuntu akafuni ukuphuma, esabe ukuxhumana nabanye. Kodwa ezimweni ezinjalo awavamile.

Isimo ehluke ngokuphelele kulapho beya nomuntu oyedwa siphilile kodwa ngasizathu simbe uhlangabezana nobunzima lapho komphakathi. Ngokwesibonelo, indoda beqiniseka ilungelo lakhe, kodwa ukuvikela umbonwabo bengayi. Abanye abazi ukuthi ukuveza imizwa ukuze eziqondwa abantu abaseduze naye. Abanye ngenxa isizotha yabo futhi umuzwa kuqiniswa isu lokungacunuli bayesaba baxhumane umuntu limnandi kubo. Bathanda okuthile ubambe ngaphakathi, hhayi sivumele ukwakha ubudlelwano nomphakathi. Othile luncike yabanye abantu, ukwesaba ukubona nje bese ke ophethe sonke isikhathi emthunzini, kodwa ngasese ufuna ukuba abe umholi. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, lezi zinkinga kungaholela munyu, yokucasuka ku circuit emhlabeni futhi ku "icala." Kungani lokhu kwakwenzeka? Indlela ukwesaba eyakho?

Indida itholakala lokuthi ukuthi ukugwema bezoziphatha ngenxa yokwesaba yabo akuyona indlela ukuzivikela. Kuphela efika kuqala kubonakala sengathi enkambweni yabo siqu wesifunda ezweni kwenza impilo ekhululekile. Empeleni akunjalo.

Ubunjalo besintu ngokwesisekelo zobugovu. Uma imvelo azizwa ukwesaba kwakho, ezimweni eziningi, kuphela self-isiqinisekiso ungalinda esikhundleni ngokumsiza ngenxa "skromnyagi". Yiqiniso, zikhona amaSamariya amayunithi ukuthi bayakwazi ukubonisa uzwela futhi ungisize, uma bebona ukuthi umuntu kudingeka. Kodwa njengoba umthetho, abantu - "eziyingozi." Ngakho kudingeka uzivikele kakhulu. Ngakho, indlela ukuba sinqobe ukwesaba ukulwa emuva esimweni esinzima?

Ukungaqiniseki e abaningi wakhulela kusukela besebancane: abazali esiqinile, othisha musa ukuqonda (siqala ngokungazi) eningi ukuphula ubuntu kwengane, zidinga ukuzithoba. Ukwesaba bahlala abantu abaningi.

Ungakwazi sinqobe ukwesaba, ngaphandle asebenzise usizo lwangaphandle. Ukuze wenze lokhu, akudingeki izazi zokusebenza kwengqondo, ungenza ngisho ngaphandle "uwumnikazi wenkampani" abangane nezihlobo.

Ukuze balahle ukwesaba futhi bazethembe ngokwazo kudingeka aqeqeshwe (noma umsebenzi). Impumelelo kwezemidlalo incike yemisipha futhi nokucija amakhono. Futhi ekuphileni kwansuku zonke impumelelo kuzodinga ukuqeqeshwa. Ngakho-ke, ukuxhumana ngangokunokwenzeka, ngisho noma ungazizwa lesi sidingo. Izikhangibavakashi ezokuthutha, nabathengisi esitolo, omakhelwane - wonke umuntu abe "abaqeqeshi" ukuthuthukisa ukuzethemba kwakho futhi ukukhululeka ekwesabeni. Ngakho-ke ngeke baqonde ngokushesha kangakanani ukuba banqobe ukwesaba, futhi bakwazi ukubhekana naso.

Ngo inqubo yokuxhumana CONCENTRATE ku interlocutor yakhe nokuziphatha kwakhe kwangaphandle, hhayi ukuzama ukuthola ukuthi wayecabanga njengoba ubona, futhi lokho kwabathinta you khiqiza it. Udinga ngifunde ukugxila zokuxhumana zangaphandle, enqabela a "kwangaphakathi monologues, agumenti" ukuthi zisenza sibe ukwesaba eziyihlazo. Lokhu kuzovumela ukubona ukusabela interlocutor, ukuqonda ukuthi yini ayicabangayo. Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukuze ukwazi ukuthola ibhalansi kwangaphakathi futhi ukuqeda izinkinga bokuphila ekuxhumaneni (emphinjeni ezomile, amalimi awahlobene nalokho, umjuluko emabunzini) nezingokwengqondo (ungeke uyikhohlwe lokho ofuna ukukusho futhi ulahleke).

Ungazama futhi baphendukele indlela nangama ezesaba ngayo - ukwenza olubhalwe, bese ngomlilo. Lokhu kuzoba ukukhululwa ngokwengqondo kulokho bethukile ngaphambili. ekutholeni nje inkululeko kwangaphakathi futhi ziqala ukukhulumisana ku-nokuwumisa alinganayo, wena ngeke baqonde indlela ukwesaba.