Zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo: ubuchwepheshe, injongo, izibonelo. Psychology yokuxhumana

Ngamunye wethu oseke ihlangabezane umqondo ezifana zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo. Lokhu kuwuhlobo ekuchumana lapho omunye interlocutor ngokwengqondo umphumela ngakolunye izinjongo zabo. Futhi lokhu kwenziwa ngasese.

On oda

zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo kusho ukuzuzwa yalokho ezithile. Kungani umuntu ayengase afune ukusebenzela umuntu ku ezingeni ngokwengqondo? Uma ungakwazi nje ukuxoxisana noma cindezela evulekile (okuyinto inguqulo ezibophayo kakhulu). Nokho, ezandleni - abantu ngobuqili isibili futhi uhlakaniphile. Bafisa ukuthola abakudingayo, futhi ubukeka umuhle ngesikhathi esifanayo (ngokwemigomo yamazinga womphakathi). Kanyekanye ezandleni kungenzeka ukugwema ukuziphindiselela, ukucasuka nokungeneliseki phezu ingxenye abaphikisi.

By the way, zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo livame ukubizwa kokucindezelwa imfihlo. Abantu abazi okuningi kulo, baphendukela umkhonyovu, Bluff, ukukhwabanisa, ngobuqili, imidlalo obunobuhixihixi, ukucunula, inkulumo-ze.

Isibonelo okuphawuleka kakhulu okuyinto ngokoqobo wethu uyazi - kungcono "MMM". kumasikhuphulane, ngokusekelwe elihlakaniphile (kodwa musa ukuthi ngokwethembeka) umuntu. Wakwazi ukwenza abafundile, abantu ezihlakaniphile bame emigqeni uyahlanya ukuze baphe abanye imali yabo kanzima isakhiwo engaziwa ezingaphezu kuka disreputable. Abazange bente loku ngobe okuthandwa yibo. Ukubona ukuthi beza kuye ngemva zonke ukuthengiselana.

ukuphila

Izici yokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo, singakwazi bagcine ekuphileni kwansuku zonke. Ngokuqinisekile wonke kanye into esiyifunayo, azama ukukholisa, ebhekisela izitatimende zabantu abadumile noma ulwazi ezindaweni ezinedumela elihle. Kungatholakala kubhalwe kuyo yonke indawo. Ukubala simiswe ngalendlela lelandzelako: umuntu wezwa igama ezidumile, ngeke bakholwe loko lokushiwo nakwetfulwa uhambe njengoba efuna nje umphikisi wakhe.

Abanye bakwenza siyidebeselele, namanye amacebo. Ngokwesibonelo, kugcizelelwa ukwethembeka nokuzinikela. Lona imishwana ezivamile like "ungithande!" Noma "Uneminyaka umngane wami omkhulu." Kodwa bafike basakaza khona kakhulu. Kodwa iningi nangezindlela ezibekwe ngokuhlukile kancane, like, "Awunalo uyangithanda!" Noma "Ngakho, ungenaso umngane kimi nhlobo." Kube isivele ingcindezi obuphatheka ngesandla. Lo mlisa uzwe lokhu, engena yentukuthelo yokuthi useduze ukungabaza futhi ufuna ukubonisa isenzo okuphambene. Yikuphi bemlindile futhi abaphikisi.

Abaningi nolukhohlisayo nobuchwepheshe bezokuxhumana ziyabonisa futhi ukubonakaliswa izinzuzo abantu ukuthi ungathola, uma kukhona azokwenza. Lokhu kwenzeka kokubili ekhaya nokukhangisa. Kodwa isibonelo esiphawuleka kunazo - nemikhankaso yezombusazwe.

Ingcindezi isihawu - omunye amasu olukhohlisayo. Ukuze abantu bakhe yakhetha abafuna endabeni ethile wagcwalisa ngabo.

Futhi indlela yokugcina ungaphawula ukunakwa - ungamandla nezinsongo. Isibonelo esimangalisayo - omabhalane ejensi abafanele, okuyinto esobala kakhulu futhi elula ukuchazela abantu ukuthi imiphumela bangamenze sikulindele esikhathini esizayo esiseduze uma bengenayo Square up izikweletu.

obunye ubuchwepheshe

Ngenhla siye ohlwini amasu ambalwa nje nolukhohlisayo yokuxhumana. Nokho, zikhona namanje nabaningi futhi abakwazi indiva.

abalawuli Ziningi engakwenqeni kusebenza umqondo ezivamile interlocutor. Bona azizivuni - nje banxuse komuntu. Kodwa kuyadukisa.

Abanye ubheke ngabanye. Ebhekisela kulabo noma ezinye izici interlocutor, ngazo. Abanye bazama nezindlela ukungazi. Ngokwezwi nezwi igama elithi "wathela" okomuntu futhi amaqiniso zazo yena ubengawazi. Ayini amandla layo, yebo, angabaze ukuthi avume icala. Futhi uma uzama isu ke abaphikisi ukubukeka yokuhlambalaza at kuyo athi: "Anazi yini lokhu? Awu, kahle ... "abese, waxosha interlocutor upende uyaqhubeka umsebenzi. Ekugcineni, umuntu ukholwa manipulator, bekholelwa ukuthi "onolwazi" umuntu.

Ezinye usengakwazi banxuse kuyize. Ukusebenzisa ukuthopha okwakusobala nokudumisa olungenamkhawulo, ingalo ulindele ukuphungula isikhundla interlocutor futhi complaisance yakhe. It ngokuvamile uhambisana emadlelweni yokuziqhenya: "Aniboni yini ukuthi ayikwazi ukwenza? Ngineminyaka ecishe ibe ngu umbono wakho omkhulu, ngacabanga ukuthi ziqinile futhi enesibindi. Uzakwabo Your N. ngokuqinisekile bangavumelana! "Lokhu singakubiza godu ngokuthi ugqozi antipodal.

By the way, kaningi zokukhwabanisa ephelezelwa imishwana efana "Kodwa wathi ngokwakho ukuthi ..." noma "Ngakho isho ukuthi uyakwazi uyakwazi ke!" Lapho abaphikisi idwetshwa yokuthi umuntu nezinsolo ayekucabanga, yena ngokwezwi nezwi leli gama disarms.

ukuhlela

Abantu abadinga into isitha zabo sina, ukwakha lonke uhlelo, ngokulandela eyoba kuzuzwe oyifunayo. Ngokuvamile kuthatha isikhathi eside, kusukela sengozini kuyinto engathí sina, ukuthi nje ngeke bakwazi ukuthola.

Sitholakala nobuhlobo bomuntu siqu. Ngokwesibonelo, intombazane abahahayo, kakhulu ekuphileni ukuphupha we ngokunganaki, kodwa ocebile empilweni, lucky ngijwayele eyindoda ecebile. nezimemezelo zakhe njalo yothando neyobuqotho yobudlelwane bakhe namandla ukuze "isisulu" yakhe. Nokho, abantu abanjalo azizona iziphukuphuku, futhi kufanele wenze izinto ngenxa ubufakazi babo "sina kanye nezinhloso ngobuqotho." Kodwa ekugcineni uphathe ukufeza kusiza oyifunayo. Basetshenziswa bancishwa amandla. Futhi "umhleli" lokukhwabanisa uyakwazi ukuphatha kwabo.

Yini enye okudingeka ukwazi?

zokuxhumana olukhohlisayo izici zayo - kuba nesihloko ezithakazelisayo. Kafushane, kuyafaneleka ezinye zezimpawu ukunakwa umphumela esicashile ngaphezulu.

Ukuze ugweme lokho, udinga ukulandela lokho nokuthi umuntu ukhuluma. Angase azame "ukucindezela" Umphikisi amazwi akhe sona, okuyinto abe impahla okuyiluthayo nokuqashelwa zamanga. Lapho umthombo eqala ukugxila imizwa, futhi kuyadingeka ukuba usola iqhinga. Kubalulekile ukulondoloza ukungathathi ihlangothi kanye ukuzama ukuqonda ukuthi yini ngempela lifihle ngaphansi umgubuzelo ukuthuthumela izwi namehlo ezimanzi ngezinyembezi.

Abaningi ukudala isizinda yokufakelwa wokuphuthuma umzwelo okuyinto isusa ukunaka kanye kuphakamisa izenzo ngokushesha futhi ukuqubuka. Esikhathini sphere yokuhweba inthanethi kuvamile. Ngithathe uqinisekile abaningi baye babhekana isimemezelo esinjalo: "Sensation! Indlela entsha ukunciphisa umzimba! Minus 15 amakhilogramu ngoba ngenyanga! Izinto ukuthenga inkambo ngoba ruble 999 kuphela - imizuzu 10 washiya ngaphambi kokuphela isenzo 'kungase kubonakale, xxi leminyaka egcekeni, bonke kufanele kakade ukuthi isebenza kanjani, kodwa namanje ingxenye okuqinile kwabantu "wathenga" ngoba izindlela ezinjalo !.

Kukhona reception angawethusi. Kuyinto baningi abantu namuhla. Futhi abaningi babo babhekana. Nasi isibonelo: Umuntu ishicilele World Wide Web ukhangisa ukuthi ifuna umsebenzi. Wayefanele umnikelo ovela inkampani ezinye izimonyo, okuyinto kakhulu kahle babika konke: imali kanye sipho esikhulu kakhulu, futhi wena nje kudingeke nisebenze amahora 2-3 ngosuku, futhi iholide zokungcebeleka, futhi kube semthethweni, kanye nezipho ezivela inkampani. Le ndoda uyavuma, iza ukuxhumana "umqashi" lutholwa, futhi kuvela ukuthi kuzodingeka ngithenge imikhiqizo wale nkampani for ethile, ngisho ukushoshozela abanye ukuba ujoyine. Khona-ke pops up uthole imininingwane eyengeziwe futhi mnandi ngesisekelo okuyinto kuba sobala ukuthi izinto akuzona inzuzo ngakho. Kodwa abantu babekholelwa abaphikisi. Kodwa uma kungenjalo, uma choice akwenzayo, eqinisweni, ayikwazanga? Futhi lokhu kumane nje kuyisibonelo esisodwa.

Ukuhoxiswa umongo

Enye indlela, okuyinto nsé ashiwo ngenhla. Indlela ukuqaphela ukuthi lokhu kwaba ezingeni olukhohlisayo yokuxhumana? Kulula kakhulu futhi alula. Uma abaphikisi ugcwele ecula futhi ukhuluma kuphela mayelana ezintabeni igolide. Kuyinto ububanzi olufanayo lomsebenzi futhi ibhizinisi zokuxhumana.

Yini eyenza manipulator? Ebalekela okushiwo umongo zangempela. Ukushiya ukuthi kuphela ezingasetshenziswa sivuse isithakazelo ophikisana naye. Ngakho uba ukushayela ukucabanga umhubhe emincane.

Isibonelo - lwemali yokuhweba. Lena indlela yangempela ukuthola imali, kodwa hhayi bonke, yonke indawo. abantu ongakhanyiselwe kungukuthi ngempela lokumba, ngakho uma kuziwa kusukela isiphakamiso indoda okuthiwa elihle hle, Ngiqinisile ngithi kini: wadla inja kuleli cala, bakholelwa. Futhi manje uqala nolukhohlisayo kakhulu zokuxhumana ibhizinisi. Yikuphi esiholela okungaphezu kwalokho. Khona-ke, uma umuntu eba isisulu "onegunya" umphikisi wakhe usuqalile lokuxhaphaza izenzo zakhe: ekutshela kuphi imali futhi kungakanani, indlela ukugembula nendlela ukuqondiswa. Ngenxa yalokho, isisulu iqaphela yokuthi lena ukukhwabanisa okumsulwa. Lapha it is kwenzeka nje kudaleke umonakalo.

Ibhizinisi & Imisebenzi

Ingabe endaweni lapho zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo kwenzeka kaningi kunabo. Futhi akuve kuvamile. Shona akuphazamisi ngamandla abangaphansi kwakhe - ngenkosi kubo nasengqondweni, okuwenza abe inkohliso zenkululeko nokuzibusa.

Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi iyini injongo zokuxhumana yalolu hlobo zokukhwabanisa Njalo nje isuke isekelwe wesifunda ethile. imodeli Excellent wadala zengqondo American Eric Berne. Layidalile yesikumu ezithakazelisayo ezintathu ukuzazisa-izikhundla. Basuke evamile ezikhonjiswe ngososayensi "umzali" (P) "kwabantu abadala" (B) futhi "Ingane" (D). Kanjani isikimu? Omunye Ungaqonda nge isibonelo.

Ngokwesibonelo, emhlanganweni ihlelwe yinkampani. Futhi ikhanda Kuyadingeka ukuya khona, lokho kubikiwe. Kodwa wayengafuni. Isikhundla "umzali" yilo: "Ukuya kubalulekile - kungumsebenzi wami. Futhi isibonelo okufanele ilawulwe ukufaka. " Ngesikhathi esifanayo, "abadala" uthi: "Umhlangano - Saze sadlala ngesikhathi. Ngine etafuleni kusukela imibiko breaking. " Futhi isikhundla "Ingane" yilo: "Uma ngihamba hhayi kude, boss kuyoba uthukuthela kakhulu." Ekugcineni, isinqumo kwenziwa kanje: inhloko uya emhlanganweni, kodwa kuthatha nephepha ukuthatha ngokushesha futhi usebenzisane kuyo leyo ndawo. It kuvela ukusilela ezinengqondo.

Leli cebo elula - ithuluzi asizayo manipulation ukuhlaziywa emibhalombiko. Lapha kukhona umzabalazo okuncane ezingokwengqondo, kumane kuyindaba yokuzikhethela, kanye ukusatshalaliswa izikhundla.

Izinhlobo zokukhwabanisa kwezamabhizinisi

Isihloko ibhizinisi kanye nomsebenzi okufanele bajule. Kusukela ngaleso sikhathi kukhona ezinye izinhlobo ezithakazelisayo kakhulu yokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo.

Ukwamukelwa "Mina ngiwahlanganise", isibonelo. Lisho ukuthini igama elithi? Umsebenzi uqobo ebizwa ukusithatha kweqembu ngithunyiwe. Futhi lapho esuka kuye bezama ukuthola womphumela othile eqala ukungakuthandi, isebenze ukuminyana yayo, okhalazayo ukuthi "weza." Kwezinye kukhona umuzwa wecala, futhi banquma ukuba uthinte isisebenzi.

Enye inqubo ezithakazelisayo ngokuthi "intandane Kazan." Umsebenzi uzama ukuba angaweli amehlo amakhanda. Bese ukhala ababazungezile ukuthi akusho ukuqaphela, futhi abazange uyaphi.

"Izingane emsebenzini" - ubuye imiklamo okuhle. Konke ilula. Isisebenzi uzenza oyisiphukuphuku, ukuzikhohlisa futhi ngeshwa, ozakwabo noma boss bayabubula Ukuzehlisa: ". O, yebo kulula ukwenza konke, lokho ukuchaza into" Adume kakhulu izaba abasebenzi ezimweni ezinjalo: "Awu, angiyona Uprofesa, indlela ingabe" (lapha umphumela luphakanyiswa ukuthopha ngaphezulu ukucasha), "ngihluphekile owesifazane ukuzilwela!", "Ngingumfana oyisiphukuphuku kakhulu, futhi kungakhathaliseki ukuthi akukho okuhle." Abantu abaningi ukuqonda pass nenzuzo indlela isiwula. Lapha injongo zokuxhumana licacile - ukudambisa khona ithimba futhi ukhokhelwe, tuneyadstvuya.

umndeni

Lena enye indawo lapho zokukhwabanisa kuyinto evamile. Le nqubo ye "ingane emkhayeni" ngokuvamile zisebenzisa amadoda ubuvila. Unkosikazi bayalelwe ukuthi uya esitolo? Thenga hhayi ngalokho okwakudingeka. Khona-ke umfazi ngeke liphinde lithole indawo ukuya esitolo, ukuze sigweme ukuba anyakazisa imizwa yabo futhi ukuyothenga futhi. Yiqiniso, akubona bonke abantu ezimbi. Futhi ukufunda ukuthi owesifazane oshade ukuba "izigcawu" nje enjalo kungaba lula. Ishayela isibalo sezingane, ifakwa yena nomkakhe.

Yokuzenza ebizwa ngokuthi "ngicasukile" futhi yenzeka ezindaweni ezifana zokuxhumana nolukhohlisayo. Izibonelo mningi. Ukuthi omunye unomuzwa wokuthi maduzane Engxenyeni yesibili waphendukela kuye nge isicelo ukwenza okuthile ingabe akakufuneli ukwenza kabi okungazelelwe. Ubani ziyokuza umuntu esangene enombono ecela okuthile?

Ngokuvamile, indima edlalwa ezokuxhumana waqale omuhle. Abantu kuphela konakalisa konke. manipulations yakhe. Abantu abaningi usuyisigqila kubo, bese uyazibuza ukuthi kungani ubuhlobo babo sidilike. Lapha, ngokwesibonelo, enye inqubo, ngokuthi "Ukube kwakungengenxa ngawe." Njengoba amadoda nabafazi ngenkuthalo ukuyisebenzisa. Ukuze sivuse umlingani wazizwa enecala bese uqale ukuphatha ke. "Kungani ngishada wena? Bheka indlela wabheka emva kwami, nosomabhizinisi babe! Osemusha esichithwa wena "- kuyinto imishwana enjengethi Uyi rarity? Cha Mhlawumbe uma futhi ngeke lokuxhaphaza, kodwa ukuhlukunyezwa kuzoholela isehlukaniso.

abezindaba

Ngenhla lalibhekwa kafushane somshado, yasekhaya futhi professional zokuxhumana uhlobo nolukhohlisayo. Manje Singathandaza abezindaba. Abezindaba - lingamandla wesine, futhi ekuqaleni le ncazelo kwaba zasebukhosini. Izintatheli ngaso sonke isikhathi, ukwenza umsebenzi ewusizo, ukwazisa abantu konke kubalulekile. Kodwa namuhla abaningi ngokuvamile kukhona abezindaba, okuyizinto engakwenqeni lokuxhaphaza umphakathi. Yikuphi abakholelwa. Ezinye emidiya nikwenza nezinzuzo zazo siqu, ukuze omunye iwukufuna "usizo" umuntu okuthiwa kuso inzuzo.

Uma izinsiza onegunya kunabo yezwe ngesikhathi lapho isimo ihlela ukhetho umongameli, izokhipha ulwazi ngakuthathu futhi linesisekelo esifanele lokuthi umfundi N, uma sikubeka kahle, okungalungile, khona-ke kungenzeka ukuthi abantu abathembela abezindaba kule, ngoba akusiyo ivoti. Lapho isiteshi ethile ivela ukukhangisa enhle umkhiqizo othile, yokuthengisa yayo eqala ukukhula. Izibonelo ezinjalo eziningi. Ingasaphathwa-athikili, izindaba kanye izihloko lapho abalobi esetshenziswa zonke izindlela ezishiwo ngaphambilini - nemiphumela ngokomzwelo, imibuto lengafuni mphendvulo, isikhalazo ukuze unembeza kanye nombono siqu umfundi isitayela, nokuningi.

Izinzuzo zokukhwabanisa

Akumelwe sikhohlwe ukuthi yini indima eyinhloko yokuxhumana. Kuyinto ukuthuthukiswa siqu nezingokomoya. Akukho ukwenza - zokukhwabanisa bekulokhu futhi kuyoba. Kwezinye izimo bayadingeka ngisho. Ngezinye izikhathi indlela zokukhwabanisa nokukholisa ungenza umuntu ukwenza okuthile empeleni ziyoba usizo kuye. Lokhu kwenzeka ngo imfundo, isibonelo. Abazali uphawule ukuthi ingane yabo uchitha isikhathi esiningi nokuningi kukhompyutha, ngokuqinisekile sithinta ukufunda. Yini okumelwe uyenze? Beka iphasiwedi kukhompyutha? Akunakwenzeka ukuthi izodlala ku-kuzuze ubuhlobo. Kodwa uma inhloko yomkhaya eyodla, sengathi ngengozi, ngeke lehle bebheke umbhangqwana ube esesho into enjengokuthi: "Sawubona, sinalo Vanya eside esikoleni kwakungafanele. Kuyadingeka ukuba ukhethe isikhathi ukuya ", kungenzeka ukuthi ngezinga elithile umqondo indodana yakhe umsebenzi" i insimbi okwethusayo "futhi ngokulangazela yathatha incwadi.

Kunezibonelo eziningi. Zitholakala ebuhlotsheni nabanye abantu, emikhayeni, emsebenzini, ubungane, kwezamabhizinisi. Cishe yonke indawo. Izikhundla yonke indawo. Ngoba kubalulekile ukukhumbula mayelana bonke ngenhla, ukuze bakwazi ukuyibona. Kuleli zwe lanamuhla, imfanelo ezinjalo ngeke kube engadingekile.